How Strong Is Your Change Muscle?

How to cope when life throws you a curve ball
From the book “The First 30 Days: Your Guide to Making Any Change Easier” by Ariane de Bonvoinsin.

There is something within every human being that supports us and keeps us alive and moving forward. We are born with a will to survive, a will to get better no matter what, and a will to be happier and feel good again. I have come to refer to this as the change muscle. It’s the strength that's in our DNA and the strength that is created from all of the changes we have been through. If you have forgotten about your change muscle or have yet to acknowledge it, say hello to it today.

Many times, the actual change is not the real problem; instead, we feel frustrated when we can’t find meaning in our new situation. Impatience and a longing for certainty also get in the way of the natural process of change. Our change muscle is there to help us adapt; we all have this ability. But when we go through changes, we tend to forget how powerful we are; the source of our true self-worth; our strengths, talents, and gifts; our intuition .... When you flex your change muscle, you tap into these resources.

Take action: Do more things that strengthen your change muscle

Like any muscle, the change muscle is strengthened through consistent use. Every time you are faced with a change and move through it, you are activating this part of yourself. The more you acknowledge and use the muscle, reminding yourself that you have the power to get through anything, the more it's going to serve you.

Your change muscle is always present, but sometimes you need to kick it into gear. Talk to your change muscle and listen to it with steps like these.

Your change muscle is strengthened when you:

  • Stay physically healthy, active, and fit
  • Eat well
  • Maintain optimism and hope, and focus on positive things
  • Always learn new things
  • Become conscious of your belief systems
  • Forgive
  • Are grateful and honest
  • Believe in yourself and in life's determination to bring you good things
  • Grieve any pain or loss associated with a change (let it out by crying, writing, venting ...)
  • Make firm decisions—remain clear and focused
  • Believe that something bigger—some greater power—is giving you even more strength than I can tap into
  • Are present and accepting of change by acknowledging what has happened and what actions you need to take to move on

 Take action: Avoid things that weaken your change muscle

Your change muscle is weakened when you:

  • Get overwhelmed by change demons—fear, blame, shame, doubt, guilt, impatience, anger ...
  • Criticize yourself, creating an immediate separation from your inner source of strength
  • Are closed minded
  • Refuse to trust that something good will come from this change
  • Compare yourself with other people
  • Behave in accordance with what the tribe expects of you, not activating your personal power and free will
  • Isolate yourself from sources of help or support
  • Succumb to the need to know what's next by pushing for answers
  • Don’t trust your intuition
  • Are a victim, not taking responsibility for your life
  • Insist on being right rather than listening to what life is telling you
  • Isolate yourself from your higher self
  • Spend too much energy dwelling on the past or imagining negative future scenarios

Change your life today with self-help and personal development videos on!

The First 30 Days bookGet insight on where to go from here in Ariane's book The First 30 Days: Your Guide to Making Any Change Easier, just released in paperback. Copyright 2008 by Ariane de Bonvoisin. Visit for more about Ariane.




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