Hi, I too feel the way you do. I look around me and think "Gosh, I've got a great husband, kids, house, etc.....why do I feel this way still?" I've had this emptiness for years, ever since I can remember, and nothing I do seems to fill it up. I ponder all of the time that maybe I am meant to have this and wondered if others ever feel completely fulfilled? Is it ever really possible while we're on this Earth? I suspect it has more to do with me, something about me that I am denying, and less to do with who is in my life, what I have, etc. Sometimes I feel the emptiness comes from feeling like nobody understands me, that I haven't found my place in all of this and I'm lacking in friendships.

I guess there's no easy answer, each of us has their own path to travel, answers to gain, and our own ways of finding them. I have read many, many books, and find sentences or paragraphs that hit home with me, but for the most part, I think "I know all of this already, now what?"

I don't consider myself religious, in the sense of reading a Bible or going to church every Sunday, but I do have a relationship with a Higher Being and I am very spiritual. That gets me through the tough times, but doesn't fill the emptiness.

Maybe ask yourself what it is that you really want to do with your life. It's great to have just gotten married, you have a great job, etc, but what is it that will feed your inner being, your soul and find a purpose for you.

Hi Soapwood,

I used to feel that way all the time.  I grew up Catholic, but I have always been more spiritual than religious.  I consider myself a Truth seeker more than anything.  I guess the big shift started happening when I let go of the control and told Spirit that I was tired of having to come back over and over to work stuff off.  I want this to be the last time I have to come back in the physical.  I can still come back.  I just don't want to have to come back.  After that, all the issues started to come up for me to clear away, so I would not have to deal with them again. I have been slowly letting go of my attachments to physical things, as I am learning the physical is so temporary. It is our spirit that is eternal.

Also, I began to realize how connected we are to each other.  If I hurt you, I am also hurting myself.  If God is everywhere, then God must be in me and in you, too.  And God must be in everything.  Then, I started asking questions.  If God created everything and everyone, why do we have good and evil?  Life and death?  Sunrise and sunset?  When I meditate on these things, I realize there is no permanent darkness that cannot be changed by Light.  So, there is always reason to hope. 

We see, we hear, we feel, we taste, and we interpret according to our beliefs.  Where did those beliefs come from?  Have we tested these beliefs?  Are they indeed Truth, or do they only fit certain circumstances?  Life is like a lucid dream.  Once we realize we are in the dream and we have all the power we need, we can do anything we fully believe we can do.  It takes practice, but so does walking, talking, dancing, living fully. 

And, finally, I love to play a little game where I seek God.  Jesus mentioned something about, "Seek and ye shall find; knock and the door shall be opened."  This is a lesson on faith.  So, I seek God in everything.  Lo and behold, I find God everywhere.  Life is so beautiful, even a simple ride home on the bus is a lesson in beauty.  I see acts of kindness everywhere.  I see people working off karma.  I see obstacles as opportunities for growth, now.  And everything is a learning and loving experience.

My suggestion is to take life one breath at a time, and try to be present for it.  Write back if you'd like.  We can never have too many friends!

Aumgirl

Thank you for your kind words, Aumgirl. Indeed, I am trying to change my thought process and the way I see things...it's such a struggle. One word you typed made me cry...hope. And how beautiful to know that at some point the Light will dissolve my darkness. I cling to hope daily. On my facebook page this morning I wrote , Heather is...thankful the night went by quickly and for the glorious sunrise. Surely today will be a healing day.

I find that I hold myself back daily, without even realizing it and then when I sit down and take inventory of everything that's falling apart around me, and inside of me, I think to myself that I know better than to walk blindly along. I also find that my marraige is suffering badly right now and that I'm on the brink of having to change how I am and move on in order to keep from completely shutting down. So, in that facebook comment today, it was surely a healing day. I'm just completely overwhelmed and feel utterly alone. I keep thinking, there has to more than this.

I have always been the one to see the beauty around me, to encourage others to slow down and notice the ones next to you, but find most often that I walk alone. I also find that at this time of year, a lot of my relationships/friendships start falling apart. It's like my Universe is trying to purge the toxic people around me and make me face what I settle for in order to not be lonely, to start a new year fresh. I think though that year after year of it is starting to wear me down. I just wish that whatever it is I carried with me into this life from another, I'd figure it out already. I keep wondering why would God have me here again to have me so alone and sad and if it's my decision to keep coming back, why can't I figure all of this out yet?

I'm tired of the superficial people I am running across, I want something so much deeper. Even simple situations can become so complicated for me, everything is so hard. It must be me then, something I am doing to make things that way. I not in denial about it, I'm totally ready to make whatever change I need to and keep placing my worries in God's hands...but maybe I'm just not seeing his answers.

It also didn't help much coming to terms with the fact that my best friend from high school, who tracked me down a few years ago, has "moved on". She's made it clear that I'm part of her "previous, small town girl, childhood life" and not part of her "big city, making lots of money and taking lots of vacations and living the fast life". It was devastating........I felt as if she tracked me down just to add me to her address book and "list of friends" and have another person to show off her fame and fortune to.

I know that I have to travel my life path alone or not, fight my own demons, get my own answers....but why should it be just as hard to have the good things in life too? Friends, love, laughter..seems they all come at a price for me.

Heather-Soapwood

Hello,

I was touched by your post and wanted to offer a few words. Many times the "restlessness with no name", the emptiness, and the sense of something missing in life can be seen as a call....a calling from something larger than ourselves urging us to move forward. If we ignore the call then many times the misery just continues and we repeat the same patterns in behaviors, relationships, and feeling states, over and over. But if we choose to respond to the calling with a conscious determination to see what it is....well, then many times life opens up in ways not even imagined. For many there is a troubled and difficult period called  "the dark night of the soul".....this can be a desolate place where nothing seems to work and all the old familiar things of life fall away. But again, if this is met with a conscious desire to ride it out and see what is on the other side....then the light will come. There are many ways to seek spirituality that does not tie into any particular religion and I encourage you to do this. Working with a mentor at this time can also be extremely valuable because in a way the seekers path is filled with unknowns. And although it is true that our path is one we can only walk alone, having wise guidance from someone who has gone before you can be invaluable. One book that has been very meaningful to my emotional and spiritual growth is Clarissa Pinkola Estes' -"Women Who Run With the Wolves". Sometimes before we can work on our spirituality we must first develop a deeper sense of connection and relationship to ourSelves! 

Many Blessings,

Blue Heron Rebecca

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On May 15, 2008 5:58:21 PM Carrie wrote:

My life is going really well...I have a great job, just got married, but I still feel this emptiness within me. I'm not a religious person, but I feel like there's gotta be a way to connect to something deeper. Any ideas?

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